Quarantine Thoughts

What is it all about?

I have been reflecting on life in general a lot the last couple of days. I have been thinking about the relationships I have in my own life, the people that I surround myself with, my family, the world as a whole during this entire pandemic, the list seems endless honestly. “What is it all about?” A question posed by my brother in a conversation I had with him recently. It’s a valid question and I think one that we are all asking ourselves right now while stuck in quarantine. It has really been a time to sit back and look at things from a different perspective. When your life slows down — which has happened to all of us in the wake of the current state of the world —  are you happy with where you are, who you are, what you do and who you surround yourself with? It is glaring right now if the answer to any of those questions is, “No.” So again, what is it all about?

My brother and I have been spending more time together in the last little bit and have definitely been talking more, which is something I am so grateful for right now. We have always been close, in a sense, but we have never really had the relationship where we talk on the phone multiple times a week or get to see each other that often, because of our work schedules. We have been talking about the bigger picture and the way people perceive things, how people are handling this situation differently and where to go from here. We have been really highlighting how lucky the two of us are with the support system our family brings to each of us, especially right now during all the craziness. My brother and I are so different, yet so similar in a plethora of ways. Neither of us process situations the same, at all, haha. BUT both of us understands the other and how we work, which is crucial to the strength of our relationship. 

When we got into this pandemic, no one knew how long it would last. I am pretty sure our initial thought was about two weeks — haha, what a joke. When the thought of staying at home for a couple of weeks first came into play, my mom asked me if I wanted to come up to their place in Manhattan Beach. My immediate answer was, “If I run out of food I’ll consider it.” When my brother said on the phone the other day, “What is it all about?”, I reflected on that first conversation with my mom. I looked back and realized how fortunate I was to one, have a place I could go if things got really bad. And two, that I was so happy and comfortable with where I was and where I called home. I felt supported here and even though I really did spend those first six weeks isolated, I knew that I wasn't really alone in any of it. 

Why do it all?

We all work to make money, to “live,” but I think too many of us get trapped in the “machine,” as my brother calls it, and forget to really enjoy life and what we do. Passion is something that drives my whole family. I wouldn’t say that anyone in my immediate family has a “normal” job. Not one of us works a 9-5. I am the only one with an office, per se, but my hours are far from what anyone would consider normal. We are all in fields that bring us joy and make it feel a lot less like work. My parents instilled that in us when we were really young and I am beyond grateful for that, especially right now. If I didn’t have a job that I thoroughly enjoyed, the pandemic would really make it difficult to stay motivated. 

I have talked to tons of people during all of this who are just lost, even with family, friends and a job still. It’s so interesting to me that when luxuries are taken away from some of us, it immediately impacts our happiness. The beauty of the entire pandemic is that we all have the opportunity to slow down and enjoy the simple things in life during it. Now, this is totally my opinion, and I am also an extreme introvert, so take it for what it is. I understand wanting to go to the beach, just hang out with your friends or not wear a mask to the grocery store, TRUST ME! But, to me there is so much value in the simplicity of this lifestyle. It makes you realize who is there for you and who is only there when it’s convenient. It allows you to reflect on what is important, who is important and if you are indeed on the right path for you. Do you miss your job and the fire it brings you or are you loving the break from the daily grind? Is there a way you can find more balance in your life when things get back to “normal?” What motivates you? What fuels you to be better and get up in the morning in a world where you really could stay in bed all day? What are you passionate about in your life and how do you incorporate more of it? These are all questions that have been pushing me and driving me throughout this entire situation.

Find your joy

Writing makes me happy. It’s easy and therapeutic and I do it because I want to, not because someone told me to or even because someone said I was good at it. I enjoy reflecting and being able to put my thoughts on paper. I get fueled by the chance to help others through my own words and experiences. It’s something that I didn’t stumble upon during the pandemic, but it is something that the pandemic drove me to dive deeper into (no pun intended). I have spoken to so many people that are stressed about coming out of quarantine with nothing to show for it. That’s crazy to me. If you took time for yourself, if you relaxed, connected with friends, etc., you are coming out of quarantine a better version of you. You don’t have to have a side hustle, a blog or a new business endeavor. Quarantine and isolation is different for everyone, and no matter how it is done or what you’ve spent your time doing, it was what you needed in the moment. 

I have had plenty of talks with athletes about their mental space during the pandemic. As a teenager and even as an adult, it is hard to process sometimes. In a recent conversation with one of my athletes we talked about the ebb and flow of emotions she was going through. How in the beginning of all of this, she was so motivated to eat healthy, workout and stay in constant communication with her friends. As the pandemic extended, those same desires fell flat. She no longer wanted to extend herself as much through Facetime and text messages; she was not feeling the workouts as much, and the inspiration to eat healthy went right out the window. We had long talks about it being okay to go through each of the swings brought on by all of this change and that no one EVER feels 100% all the time. 

In the last conversation, her tone was lighter, she was more motivated and focused on the present rather than trying to look so far ahead. She had a different outlook on the friendships in her life and what was important. She realized that she didn’t need to be “on” all the time and that everything in moderation worked much better for her than going hard one way or the other. When we chatted about all of her realizations, she brought up that she felt like she “had to” do certain things while stuck in quarantine. But now, she wanted to do certain things because there was a lot less pressure being placed on them from outside sources. All of the conversations we were having would have never happened had it not been for quarantine and the pandemic, because her life would have never slowed down enough for her to even feel some of the ways she was feeling. There have been such positives to come from all of this when you really allow yourself to just be present. 

So here is what I think it’s all about at the end of the day… YOU. That sounds silly and cliché, I know, but it’s true. You are living your life for you and only you. Other people come into play eventually, but you have to do and make decisions to make life better for yourself. Find a job that brings you joy. Dive into (again, no pun intended... maybe) those activities that make you happy and fuel your fire and passion. Surround yourself with people who make you better, who love unconditionally and accept your flaws just as much as all of your amazing attributes. Relax and spend time getting to know yourself on a deeper level. Trust me, it opens up your mind to accepting new things, new people, new experiences and new opportunities. It does not always have to be a grind. You do not need to work yourself to the bone and be miserable or stressed out all of the time. Try to balance your life and set boundaries with those who push a little too much or suck the life out of you. Bottom line? Live for you. Because at the end of the day — the very, very end — you are what matters

Stay safe, friends :)